As an avid “Rupaul’s Drag Race” fan, one of the things I watch out for is the tail end of each episode when the bottom 2 contestants have to “lipsynch for their lives, and save themselves from elimination” (it’s kinda like the “Tyra Banks asks the bottom 2 contestants in ‘America’s Next Top Model’ to come forward and tell them that she only has 1 picture in her hands, and the girl whose picture is not here must immediately pack her bags and go home” schtick – except there’s lipsynching involved and the “girls” are actually drag queens).

Well, we’re in the middle Season 5, but I’m not exactly loving some of the songs they have to lipsynch-battle over. Cases in point: “Party in the USA” by Miley Cyrus who has the looks and voice of an auto-tuned goat, and “Whip My Hair” by Willow Smith, a teeth-gnashing song that perpetrated the notion that whacking bystanders with cornrow braids makes one conceited and defensive badass.  At least the previous seasons provided a balanced mix of old and new songs. Enough of these hideous things (I refuse to call them songs). I say let’s go back to the past and give these queens something to really lipsynch to:

1. “Designer Music” by Lipps, Inc. with Cynthia Johnson on vocals
2. “Let Her Go” by Strawberry Switchblade
3. “She Bop” by Cyndi Lauper
4. “Take a Chance on Me” by ABBA
5. “Twilight World” and “Surrender” by Swing Out Sister
6. “Love is a Stranger” by The Eurythmics

and finally …

7.  Anything by Bjork – or Grace Jones …